down in my heart, where?

she's been moody lately.
no, not in a bad mood,
just more subdued than she is known for.

her bright smile was the norm
and annoyance the exception,
but more and more the table turned
annoyance her norm,
and her bright smile the exception.

she's been trying,
trying all year and more
to grasp the joy she used to have.
true joy,
not just a smile that fades in an instant,
the one that radiates from deep down,
shines through more than the mouth
radiates through the eyes...
but the more she searched herself
the more elusive her joy became,
and the more discouraged she got.

then she remembered
one important fact.

joy doesn't come from her,
so she could never find it there.
it comes from God.

the instant she remembered where to look
she found it.