forever friday

I looked forward to you...
that time of bliss at the end of a busy week,
to the things you held for me to do
the places you had waiting for me to see,
there was never a dull one,
for though many were spent inside
they were hardly ever spent alone.

Now I still look forward to you,
to the end of a less busy week,
to the potential things for me to do,
the people for me to see,
but far too often, nothing happens
and you simply become like any other day.

to the inside

Their understanding is sought,
but it is not needed.

You appear different from the outside,
but you open up, and I fall in...
deep into piles of logic
layered in a mass of confused thoughts.
The further I go, the darker it seems,
the more I mis-understand...
and yet the more I understand my misunderstanding.
I am far too deep to think of you otherwise,
to know you as others know you...
from the outside.

There is loneliness that comes with my knowledge...
loneliness, that you share far greater than mine,
for though I have fallen far,
it is not far enough
and possibly will never be.
You stand alone then,
accepting that you are possibly the only one
that can fully understand the core of you.

My understanding is sought,
but it is not needed.

and yet

So many paths that could be taken
so many mistakes not easily shaken
so many steps in the wrong direction
and still I end up here...

in a place where life is beautiful
where I can still smile and feel peaceful
where suns rise and days are hopeful
and you are always near

one on one

It is absolutely amazing how much you can learn...
how deep you can get...
how close you can feel...
how much you can appreciate someone
when you spend a little quality time alone with them.

1/4 tank of gas - $500
split meal - $300/each
phone call - $50
instant bonding - priceless

swinging

somewhere in the transitions
something got misplaced
and hasn't been recovered

a bit of happiness hiding away
missing from that place it should be
buried beneath baggage

new routines of self withdrawal
destroy the very interaction
on which one once thrived...

a swinging pendulum of emotional extremes

consumed

turn the lights off
leave me in the dark
where I wish to be
sitting alone
in the centre
of the empty room

turn the volume down
leave me in silence
untouched by the screaming,
calling, aching sounds
of the echoing world
around me

simple matters

no matter where we are in life
no matter how far apart
no matter how long we last spoke
no matter how big the fight
no matter what we did last

no matter how late it is
no matter the topic of discussion
no matter the err of my ways
no matter the price of the call
nothing matters more
than the safety I feel with you.

room for more

it's funny how this missing goes.
at first you arrive, and heaven knows
all you can think about is what you left.

little time to appreciate what is there
you just long to return to the place where
you once laid your head and felt at home.

but silently and slowly that place you are
becomes part of you, like the one afar
that you claim you miss with all your heart...

until you return to that original place
and realize there's still an empty space
for the place you were so eager to leave.

it's funny how this missing goes...

seeking sadness sufferers

There are many crippling emotions, and guilt used to be at the top of my list. But I've come to realize that nothing causes pain more than disappointment. Eight out of ten times that sadness sweeps over me, it is a direct result of that pesky D-word. And if most people really think about it, they will realize they often say 'sad' when they are in reality disappointed.

Like it or not, human interactions make or break us, and though it is highly possible to disappoint yourself, it's usually others who do the job for you. People are unpredictable. Experience soon teaches our minds to leave room for the unexpected, both pleasant and painful, but there never seems to be room enough.

But now there is help.

Disappointment cannot be cured, but it can be controlled. The least disappointing relationships are the ones that have an essential ingredient that both parties utilize equally well. It's called CHC: Consistently Honest Communication, and it works.

Yes, there's love and trust and all that other great stuff, but see how easily those break down when CHC is missing. CHC is not sold in stores, and is only available once offered and used. So go ahead. Try some. You could use some spice in your life.

~ 'Life is relationships, everything else is detail' ~

CHC is right for everyone, but side effects may vary. CHC does not control all types of disappointment and is most effective if used by everyone. If consistent disappointment occurs, consult your psychiatrist. This product is animal tested.

time after time

you started with two

you held within you many things,
trials you saw in fair share,
and some major triumphs.

a new place you explored:
new culture, new language, new family,
an experience never forgotten.

a first you witnessed:
a deep chemical sleep,
the replacement of natural with artificial.

a transition you endured:
movement of one level to the next,
the end of a struggle, immense relief.

two huge success stories!

a return you observed:
an acclimation to a place already familiar,
a re-adjustment of new into old.

you ended with one

cascades of escapades,
an almost balanced mix,
that was you... 2006